Whenever he came home it was like a holiday.
Having him in a room…
Put everyone in the best mood.
Yet when he got shipped to Iraq,
Nothing but gloom filled everyone’s heart.
Two months turned to five,
Five months felt like five years.
Thanksgiving two years past, was the last visit.
On February 7th nothing but grief was present.
My parents called my brother and I into the living room,
That moment was the worst in my life.
Uncle John had passed away.

If it was any other way, it would have been a lessened jolt.
My mom had put it this way,
“John took his own life, we don’t know why”.
The next few weeks felt like someone else’s life.
Crying, screaming, anger and mourning
Now those two years have passed;
I have a different outlook on life.
That second, minute, day, month was a blur.
I’ll never understand why he did it.
Everyone has a different reason.
John was the last person I’d expect to do such a thing.
I think about it daily,
Not too many people know;
Most everyone thinks he was a casualty of war,
Only a select few know the truth.

Looking back I cherish my memories,
Each Christmas, Easter, Parade Day, and barbeque,
All which seemed so meaningless,
Now I have no words to explain the pain of wanting them back.
He left us only to question, “Why?”
But none of us will ever know the real reason or idea he had.
Except, all my family and I know is…
We miss him; we love him, Semper Fi.