Student Publishing Program ::

Nathan M.

Gravity Rediscovered

“Wow, that’s easily the largest apple I have ev-,” Suzy thought as a different, unusually large fruit struck her on the head.

Suzy had just witnessed an incredibly large apple, about the size of her head, land directly on top of her husband’s head, effectively knocking him out. Although Suzy, now also unconscious, assumed the occurrence was some rare statistical improbability, it was far from a coincidence.

Today was the day when nature snapped.

For thousands of years, nature had been giving humankind hints that it was displeased with the current state of affairs. Through the occasional earthquake (and the less frequent climate changing volcano eruption) nature thought it was getting its message across.

In the twentieth century, the level of humankind’s disrespect grew to new highs. Deforestation, pollution, and the human population were all increasing faster than ever. As a response, nature decided to turn up the global thermometer, introducing a new problem that the humans called “Global Warming”. Although many people noticed this problem and made a rather large fuss over it, very few measures were taken to address the matter.

Nature, now feeling fully ignored, decided to take drastic action. Although in the past it had used mainly large scale tactics to increase environmental awareness, it was obvious now that humans were deliberately ignoring the needs of the environment. So, instead of using its usual large scale tactics, nature decided to address individuals this time around.

Joe Smith and his wife, Suzy, were blissfully unaware of nature’s displeasure as their yellow Hummer pulled into the national park’s parking lot. After they parked, Suzy retrieved the picnic basket from the SUV’s spacious trunk while Joe consulted the trail map at the park’s entrance. One of Joe’s secretaries at his logging company had told him about a fantastic trail that led to a small clearing. In the middle of the clearing was a grassy, climbable hill with a giant, old apple tree on top.

After a half hour hike, the couple reached the clearing and saw the massive tree. Suzy snapped a few pictures that she intended to show her friends later, and the couple proceeded towards the small hill.

The two climbed the hill and set up their checkered picnic blanket at the base of the tree. Suzy set down the picnic basket and admired the beautiful view of the park with her husband.

“You know,” said Suzy, “I find it remarkable that on a day like today, we can put all of our troubles aside.”

“I know what you mean,” replied Joe. “I love days where you can just relax. It’s like living like this apple tree, every day soaking up the sun, no worries whatsoever.”

This final comment was the last straw for the apple tree. It had planned on letting the couple take a few bites of lunch, then delivering its message. But Joe’s ignorance needed to be punished immediately. After quietly shifting its trunk so no branches would get in the way, the tree loosed its two gigantic ruby red bombs, one slightly after the other. And so began nature’s quest for revenge.

[TABLE OF CONTENTS, LHS CLASS OF 2009 EDITION]